Sometimes it is too late.

James died of a heart attack on October 28th. He was 48 years old. He came to Thailand and met Mu in a Bangkok jewellery shop. He had lived off her ever since. She said he had used up all her savings and they had been forced to move into a cheap shophouse in a small soi behind Ta Pae Gate where she took in washing to survive. He said that he had no money but there were four large trunks full of expensive clothes and a collection of classical CD's. Later a friend was to tell me that he knew James had $78, 000 in some bank account and that he was certain James had been murdered.

The Embassy traced his mother in Scotland and she requested that the funeral should be held at 11 o'clock on November 6th so that she could think of him at that time. A distant cousin would come from Bangkok. At this point confusion set in. I and Mu had made all the arrangements for a Buddhist funeral at Chang Puak crematorium with a simple prayer said by a missionary but, unbeknownst to me, the Embassy and the cousin had arranged for a Bangkok undertaker to organise a Christian cremation at Chang Klang. The upshot was that I and the body went to one place and the missionary to another. As 11 o'clock struck I had no option but to conduct the funeral service. I got stuck halfway through the Lord's Prayer and frantically extemporised into some prayers I vaguely remembered from my school days.

Among James's papers I found this letter.

Hello,

I have just wrote 'hello' because I am not sure what to call you. You are my dad but I haven't seen you for a long time.

I am 5ft 5in tall and have brown/blond hair. I don't have any hobbies, but I go swimming occasionally. I am interested in pop music and like lots of pop singers.

I go to G. high school and am in year 10. At the end of the last school year I chose my options: childcare, social science, French, geography and history. My favourite subject is childcare. I also like PE and games.

I was wondering why you didn't contact me before, thought of it? I decided to contact you because a lot of people knew you and I didn't.

My Mam and I live in a house with another family Shahin, Sita and Niel. Altogether we have a lot of pets: 2 puppies, 2 cats, 2 guinea pigs, 1 hamster and 2 terrapins.

Could you please send me a photo of you; I have enclosed one of me. Could you also send your reply via aunty J.

Gemma

He never did.

Remember, kind reader, that sometimes it really is too late.